Waiting for a new life
wow, it's been more than a year since I last wrote here. I'm very busy with my exam stuff and I did't feel like writing here. But one thing that encourages me to write is my first album I bought in 2010. It's Vanja's December Diaries. I hope it can bring me good luck for my public exam in mid-March and Vanja's long hard road to popstardom will be fine^^
I also hope this year I can study linguistics at HKU and spend more time on Swedish after the public exam in March and April!^^
Vanja's debut album December Diaries :) Really look forward to listening to it! :D
I should be alive
January usually is a good start for everyone.
But it seemed hard and sad to me.
I got the results of 2-week-long school exam just before the Chinese New Year.
I could take a relief cos I just passed all the subjects...Sigh!!
But other classmates' were much higher than mine! Should I be happy with my results?
Either way, I have another school exam in June. I can't lose next time cos it determines whether I can go to the final year in the high school. I shouldn't repeat the studies....I should be alive at school!
My school life is a bit improved since I know a girl in my class. We shared secrets....and I have a little bit affection for her. Actually I shouldn't start this relationship so fast...we still don't deeply understand each other. But sentimentally I couldn't control myself to date her. It came and went so fast, only 2 weeks and karma came. We now have a cold war and get nothing to chat. I do regret doing such kind of thing so early. In retrospect, I learn a lot through this....understanding each other matters ..... forgiving and forgoting!
but there's one thing really impressed me in Jan is, my dearest Swedish friend, Sara, sent me a big gift to me!!!:D
It's really a godsend!! :))) Tack så mycket!!! Wing Suet!=)))
This episode ' I shouldn't be alive' is truly inspiring and breathtaking!
I should be alive, even though many difficulties lies ahead!
Hoppas jag mår bra i 2009
Everyone suffers a lot financially, emotionally, mentally....Economy in the world seems to be gloomy in 2009.
To me, my studies is getting more and more difficult!
I'm getting lazier...>< always fail many school tests...
I have to work harder....no more lazinesssss...
Gott Nytt År!:D
Gott Nytt År! Happy New Year!!:))))
All the bad news in 2008 was past, but the good things're worth a notice!=]
Hopefully everthing'll get better in 2009!
Merry Christmas!!^^
Holiday finally has come!!!:D It's so good!
Try to enjoy every day and have fun, mates!!
Of course, I have to do revision for the coming exam in January too!! It's not good! =.=
Have a nice holiday and take a rest, guys!!
I heard of this song in TVB programe 'One Cubed' on Sunday 6:25 pm! Lovely!!:D
Long-awaited December
I finally have chance to breathe a sigh of relif......The long-awaited December comes finally!!:D
November really killed me. For one thing, the weather changed drastically and for another, there is no holiday in November. >< But I can't change those unchangeable facts.
There's another thing makes me unhappy in November. I can't get control of my performance in my studies.
Things get more and more difficult and I feel helpless! My schoolmates're getting more and more higher marks in different tests. But I always fail. No matter how harsh the school life is, I have to be tough cos I don't want to repeat my studies. It's literally a waste of time and money!
Everything gets better in December, hopefully.
A hopeful song by Enya...Hope is home and the heart is free.
I'm not the best or the worst. BUT I'll try my best!!!!
Studying in Hong Kong really stresses your marks in every subject....even in physical exercise lesson.
Last month I had my first attempt of hurdle....I thoght it might be very interesting cos I'd never tried it before.
during the lesson, I gave it a go and found it easy to handle. suddenly, my teacher gave us a test on hurdle and saw whether I mastered the skills we'd JUST learnt....Oh my God!!! I ended up getting the lowest mark!>< Everything here fully depends on your marks....mark is everything!
I wasn't born with a talent for sport. But I do try my best to do exercise...to improve myself
school picnic
after this 2-month school life, I find my classmates hypocritical and dark!!!They are gossips and always stab somebody they hate in the back.....so I'm the one left out in the class!
24 Oct was our school picnic. The place we had our picnic is very nice, called Shek O, with a gorgerous beach and a blue sky. And of course I saw many beautiful blond girls and adorable kids playing with sand.
Even though I didn't enjoy the moment with my classmates, I had my private time to hang around and enjoy the sunshine and cool breeze in the beach......literally free from pressure! I wish I could live in the beach!!:D
tears
Every day at school, I try very hard to choke back my tears.....on the way home.....until I'm back home and wail!!!
how come? is it all my fault??!!!??!!
I've done what I'm supposed to do....even it's failure, there's always a way out......I really sicken for the way my classmates act! I become more and more school-phobia now......how can I stick at these 2-year studies?!!???!!>.<
unspeakable worries
The whole world seems to be flooded with an ominous atmosphere....
Lehman Brothers went bankrupt and collapsed....financial tsunami...much unpredictable and pessimistic news are ready to strike Hong Kong
in my school life, I'm ready to be scolded by teachers, ready to have many difficult tests...homework....detention classes...busy school duties....I'm really too hard-up to buy a lunch cos school always asks students to pay for the exercise books....
crying = coward ?
it means a man of courage doesn't cry despite any diffculties or anything unpleasant.
so a man who like crying is a coward?? Is it too ridiculous?????
sometimes I think some of the Chinese tradtions are a little strange.
I'm studying science but sometimes I'm quite sentimental....like crying to express my pent up depression and unspeakable pressure as well as music. and when i watch a touching movie, tears naturally well up in my eyes.
then it means I'm chicken-hearted??
well, some of Chinese man, who believe in male chauvinism, usually think crying is embarrassment......lose their face.
C'mon, just be your true self....there's nothing wrong with crying!!!
Goodbye, September 2008
for me, it's very hard to get on with this stressful September.
difficult tests....homework.....experiments.....report......school duty like prefect......i've never expected all these things come within this first month of the last 2-year challenging high school life.
i still have a long way to go and have to be tough enough to get over this hard times.
Grit my teeth and stick at it!
Future is always full of uncertainty.....but i don't care.
just enjoy your time....have fun with it!:D
let's have the time of our life!
i have no choice.....
i have no choice.....cos such is life in Hong Kong.
i have no choice.....cos i was born to be myself
i have no choice.....cos the education system in Hong Kong is so stressful and ossified.
i have no choice.....cos no matter how much i eat, i'm still skinny.
i have no choice.....cos i'm shy and not talkative.....i'm always left out in school.
i have no choice.....cos most of my close schoolmates and lunchmates has gone to other school
i have no choice.....cos i'm still a student at this moment
I have no choice.....cos i'm not in the worst situation in the world....i gotta work hard.
i have no choice.....can it be that it's my karma?
i have no choice.....so i'm here to express my feelings!
Raise my weight!!!
and when i had my first PE lesson and measure our weight and height, the teacher also felt shocked for my build......"is there anything wrong with your health? you look very tall but you're very light...JUST 50 KG!!!"
omg.......i'm always frustrated by my skinny build.....no matter how much i've eaten, i'm still very skinny!!!!!
so, from now on, i have to RAISE MY WEIGHT.....EAT AS MUCH AS I CAN!!!!!!!!! KISS GOODBYE WITH MY SKINNY BODY!!
finally i watched the movie Mamma Mia yesterday!!!!!
That's truly a great moive!!!!Fantastic!!!:D
The all time great ABBA masterpieces in the movie makes it the icing on the cake!!!:)
temporary study-phobia
i've got back to normal school life for a week, but still can't adjust to that.
one day after the school reopen day, many unusual physiological reactions emerged during this week.....sore throat, constipation, spermatorrhea.......is it bad karma?
and most of my close friends and students no longer study with me at the same school cos their public exam result fell short of the promotional requirements. we each other are busy with our work.
besides, some of students from prestigious schools become my classmates. i get to know all of them from scratch and it's quite challenging cos some of the boys and girls always form their own circles....omg!!! it really makes me numb...
so during lunchtime, i had my lunch on my own. all my close lunch-mates leave me....
and to my hatre, a girl who makes me sick....a slutty and coquettish chick..... always appeared whenever i was unhappy!!!!
actually, she's my first lover......my first love affair was 3 years ago....just lasted 9 months......and after that she had many affairs with many boys....some of them are younger and older than her.......she definitely sucks!!!!!!!
she'll study with me at the same form in these 2 years..........poor!!!
a stressful syllabus......in these 2 years i have to cram much stuff into my mind and endlessly do sums......binomial.....intergration.......differentiation................a terrible curse......
but there's one thing comforts me.......i've got a very nice English teacher, Mrs Lee.
whenever i meet her, she always greets at me warmly and smile.......in fact we know each other quite well cos my English performance in school and public result were quite prominent and she'd noticed me before.
and so i'm prepared to be English class representative.....help her with the books circulation and collecting in class.
i even shared her my secret that i want to be a volunteer in London Olympic Games at Friday.
she looked happy and surprised to know that and really support me.
so i try my very best to brush up my English in these 2-year preparatory level for university with Mrs Lee's help!^^
school reopen day
and 1st Sep was the school reopen day in Hong Kong.
well, so far so good....but something bad happened.
I'd tinted my hair red in the summer holiday......and tried to tint it black with hair coloring product.
but it can't color my hair black.......Oh my god!!!!!
if i didn't color my hair black before the school reopen day, i would be punished!!!!
in the last resort, i had a strange idea.....guess what?? it's black watercolor........crazy!!! =D
I spent a lot of time "painting" my hair black after i woke up in the morning and time went by quickly.....i scarcely forgot i had to leave......finally i rushed to school with my body gettting wet cos the weather was extremely hot!!!!!!!><
and damn! i was late for school.....
fortunately, there were many students with the same situation as me......i took a relif at once. after all, it's the first school day and we all need more time to get used to that normal school life.
All in all, it was a curse more than a blessing!!!><
i have a kind of feeling that these two years are going to be ominous!
Prefect training camp
well, it was a mixed blessing.
At first day, i went to school in the morning cos we all Form 6 prefects and Tim, the person in charge of the camp, had to prepare all the things used in the camp. and then, we meet all the senior prefects from Form 2 to Form 4 in the afternoon. i was kind of nervous and shy cos i was a team leader of a gorup and honestly i've never been a leader!!! i chatted with my teammates i've never met before and made the introduction and you know.....i'm not good at talking with strangers. and even worse, they were much more shier and just gave me a cold shoulder......oh well, a kind of bad feeling suddenly fell on me and i felt there might be an extremely tough challenge ahead of me!!!
after the arrival of all students, we'd had some warm-up teamwork games for about 2 hrs. it's nearly 4:30pm and Tim asked all the groups to make a list for dinner tonight. I really dunno why we could be so excited and united while planning for the dinner. did the teamwork game work some magic on all of the team? all the shiness between us had absolutely vanished!!!it was the miracle of the teamwork!
we all went to the supermarket for the food of our dinner after the planning and got many problems while buying such as the high prices of the food (thanks to high inflation!!!><), whether the food was fresh or not.....but time was running out. we got to move very fast and rushed to school to cook our dinner. well, some teammates originally said they had no idea of cooking and even had never cooked. but everything was okay and they gave it a try. surprisingly the dinner was delicious and we all enjoyed it very much!!
but worse thing was to come after three teamworks games at night.
everyone was force to had a bathing within 5 mins!!!! and there was no wooden blocker in the bathing room!!!! Nightmare!!!!><
so i just wash myself with water.....
besides, we all Form 6 student have to introspect what we've done today at.....midnight!!!.......something like how would you rank your performance today (1 is the lowest.....5 the highest).....how would you improve yourself........etc those boring conclusion.......i really hate that.....T.T
at day 2 morning, i had a good time with my teamates while enjoying our breakfast and having a warm-up team work games!^^ It seemed the block between us had vanished!!^^
but something wrong happened on me....originally i had to lead all my teamates to different specific place to complete different games within a period of time but i had made a mistake and led them to a wrong place in one of the game. it doesn't affect the process..but it was my fault.....an unavoidable one....i finally made it! Shame on me.....
and i finally cried for my responsibility in front of all the teamates during the group conclusion ....after all, it was a outdoor game....and Tim was worried about our safety....i really let him down.......
finally Tim asked me to leave the group for a while and talk with me in private.....while i was crying, Tim and one of Form 7 student cheered me up with masses of stale encouragement......but i really thanked not only them, but also my team mates.....for trusting such an irrespsonsible team leader so much....it's you who can make me strong! And surprisingly, our team got the champion among all the teams....it's a miracle=D
I know there're just a few Form 6 students, including me, being school prefects......the workload must be extremely harsh. plus, i'm now a student of preparatory level for university. this level is "famous" for its great difficulty and hardship.....many of the former students even always cried during these 2 years cos the life is very stressful......and the truth is, studying in Hong Kong is no piece of cake......
hopefully i'll overcome all the challenges ahead.....with all my netmates' wishes and music as my antidote^^
everything back to normal
Actually, i have a xanga blog but it's written in Chinese and i want to brush up my English and Swedish.
That's why i lauch this blog written in English and Swedish :D
Time flies when you're having fun. This saying is exactly right!!!
16-day Beijing Olympic Games 2008 was over yesterday.
i couldn't be one of the contributors to make this centurial Olympic dream come true, but sitting in front of the TV and watching different events, seeing our Chinese flag waving and listening to our national anthem in the awarding ceremony really make me excited and impressed!
if someone asks me "will you wait for a dream which will come true in a centry?"
then i will say "yes, i will as if i waited for my girlfriend no matter what happen!"
As i was seeing the Olympic Flame in the Bird's Nest go out, somehow tears welled up in my eyes.
I tried to find out the reason but in vain.
The Olympic Games ended. That means everyone has to get used to our normal life again and my summer holiday is about to end, just a week left. so i should fully enjoy the rest.
I'll be extremely busy after the holiday cos i'm now a student in the preparatory level for university.
but this 2-year hard school life gives me a chance to be tougher than ever and make my English more fluent.
so I'm determined to be volunteer in the 2012 London Olympic Games :D
